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February 11th, 2014

09:30 pm: Iview and body fluids
We spent the morning in a cafe yawning as I made conversation and she drank and slept in my arms. I drank a coffee, a tea and inhaled a brownie. We drove to the shopping centre, a place I both love and loath. I dislike the fluorescent lights and strangers eating various greasy foods in the food court. I dislike the smells. I love the book shop, I love the ABC shop and for some reason unknown to even me; I love wandering around David Jones.

This trip involved none of these activities. This trip involved an hungry, angry baby who needed to be feed in the car, me trying awkwardly to use the bathroom whilst holding an infant as I somehow remembered and then promptly forgot to put the stroller in the car.

I attempted to pay part of my car registration. I was unsuccessful. I was hassled twice by the same skinny, awkward fundraising manboy. I failed to do anything I had planned to complete during my time in the shopping centre, so I left. I drove the two of us home where I promptly paid my registration using the online banking system, managed to put on and hang out two loads of washing and had lunch and fed the tiny human some lunch while I watched a documentary about a self professed sex addicted comedian, followed by a much more interesting documentary on David Bowie.

Perhaps today would have been even more fruitful if I had not left the house. Now we are sitting on the lounge as a family, doing what our generation does best, worshipping the internet and providing no form of verbal interaction other than to placate the grizzling baby who is currently wearing a cloth nappy which makes her look like an Oompa Loompa. I hope the pilchers hold in the body fluids. This is the first of the trial of cloth nappies.

February 10th, 2014

03:22 pm: Babies are part time lord or some such creature
There is a vortex into which time disappears, sucked up at a rate which nobody can predict. This time vortex occurs when a baby is born. I do not know where the time ends up but it certainly disappears in an alarming fashion. Has five weeks really gone by already? My only conclusion is that babies are part time lord and are somehow able to manipulate or traverse time or they are some other creature entirely that feeds off time.

All I know is that it feels like somebody has pressed fast forward on my life without my consent and yet I feel like I am moving in slow motion.

January 22nd, 2014

07:41 am: Captain's Log
Day 16

First solo mission was a success. Tiny human made it out and back to base with nil issues.

I have started keeping a schedule, lest I forget important information in this sleepless haze.

7am 13 mins Right
8..20am 7 mins Left
10am 19 mins Right
12.50 pm 10 mins Left
2.33pm 9 mins Right
4.17pm 12 mins Left
6.03pm 14 mins Right
7.35pm 9 mins Left
8.42pm 14 mins Right

It seems to be successful so far. We are expecting cloud cover and some rainfall today. A good day to stay on base.

January 20th, 2014

08:37 am: Captains log
Day 14
Today is my first solo mission. My second in command has gone back to the field to ensure that we are provided for.

The small one sleeps briefly but one cannot predict the appearance of the truffle pig so we await its appearance with trepidation.

The weather has taken a change for the better. I look forward to the brief respite from the scorching orb on this planet.

Turtle continues to patrol the steps and keep an eye out for insurgents.

January 18th, 2014

07:14 pm: The heat
You know it is seriously hot when you open the house up to cool down as the temperature drops to 30 degrees Celsius.

It has been a seriously hot week with a string of days peaking at 40 degrees and a dry thunder storm today. Lots of noise, no rain. Now the landscape looks like a bushfire is creeping over the hill behind the house. A smokey haze surrounds us as we lose the light.

I pray that tomorrow is cooler.

December 18th, 2013

02:47 pm: Summer strolling
Today I took a little walk around my suburb before the day became too hot. It was already uncomfortably warm at 9am, but I was determined to wander for a little while. I walked up the street to the mulberry tree with the tyre swing and surveyed the tree. The fruit is no good this year. I am not sure why but not one of the mulberry trees fruit have ripened this year. They have all gone brown and fallen to the ground.

I crossed over to the shadier side of the street for my return walk. This was quite nice, the house with the rose garden still has an impressive and colourful display of flowers and the house with the fig trees have pruned their trees but I think there will still be good fruit come January. The first fig has appeared on the smallest of the trees - a funny little green thing sticking out to one side. I can not wait until it changes colour.

I also discovered two plum trees laden with almost ripe fruit which is still quite tart, but will be amazing in jam or cooked into some porridge. I still have a bowl of plums that a friend collected from the streets in her neighbourhood so I need to use them up before I go hunting out more fruit. I am inspired though, I want more food trees around my house. There are some in my street, but none about my townhouse block. There are herbs about but nothing else that provides edible food.

I am looking forward to fruit from our lemon tree, hopefully it is old enough and well kept enough now that we shall see the first fruit from it in 2014. Despite rising temperatures, I am still confident our little house can weather the heat. It only comes from one direction and I am currently nutting out some management strategies in my head.

May 15th, 2013

12:26 pm: Exam season
It is week one of two of my exam week for university and my boyfriend and I have just returned from a trip to Melbourne where we visited lots of family and friends and where we somehow managed to return with a mild case of food poisoning, the after effects still lingering.

Now I just have this awful nausea thing hanging around when I eat, when I don't eat, when I drink water. Basically when I am awake. I am hoping my anti-nausea tablets kick in soon so I can go back to studying.

I also have a friend from Israel visiting which is lovely, but time consuming leading up to my exams and making me wonder where my time management skills went. I had banned visitors for May but I caved and have had Ruby and her dad stay, have my Israeli friend staying, have my partners parents coming and then my parents coming. What was I thinking?

May 6th, 2013

08:42 pm: Conversations with the elderly
I had a conversation with a resident tonight which made me laugh and shake my head.

Scene: Sitting on the bathroom floor next to an old man sitting on a toilet.

Me: Have you done a poo today?

Old man: What?

Me: Have you done a poo today?

Old man: What?

Me: Have. you. done. a. poo. today?

Old man: Yes. Yes I have brushed my teeth, oh wait no I haven't yet. You need to set out my things.

Me: Poo! Have you pooed?

Old man: Don't wash my clothes, I shall wear them tomorrow.

*Stands up from toilet with poo dangling from his butt*

Current Mood: amusedamused

April 21st, 2013

08:32 am: A morning prayer
Dear study gods...or Saraswati, goddess of eduction,

Please inspire me to finish this week late essay. It has structure, it is answering the questions, it just needs more content and evidence.
Give me strength so that I may spend the afternoon relaxing at my favourite bookshop.

Love Tatiana

September 27th, 2011

09:12 pm: Day two of freaky and disturbing dreams.
We had a house mate. I don’t know where she was from or why she was in my house but I knew she lived here. She was blind and had short blonde curly hair.

We would muck around with her occasionally and we would tickle her or she would tickle us and we would all have a laugh about it. But it became a little out of hand. When we tried to stop the game but she would just continue. It got to the point where we would just sneak past her and try not to make any noise.

I was sneaking past her down the hallway one night and she was listening to me. I could see her listening for my footfalls. I was holding my breath. I brushed the wall and caught my breath and she began to run down the hall toward me.

She knocked me to the ground. She was grinning, giggling hysterically. She had me pinned on the floor with her knee and I
had hit my head. I felt groggy.

The next thing I heard was her laugh as she pulled a knife from behind her and I knew she was going to kill me.
I woke to the sound of whimpering and crying. I realised the sound was coming from me.

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